That last post

I'm looking at it now, actually... and wow, that photo is really bad. I mean, if I hadn't taken it, I'd have no earthly idea what it was supposed to be. But, I'll tell you this: there's a couple of jackets hanging in the foreground, and that is Jonathan's (of Lewd Buddha fame) back way back in the background. Oh, and the reason it's there? Simple. I wanted to update the blog... but I (obviously) wasn't at a computer, and the only way I can do it via phone is to send a picture... so I figured that I should take a quick pic and be done with it. Yeah. Next time I have a brilliant idea like that, I'll have another beer instead, neh? ;)

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I am still serious about what I wrote that night. No "Oh my gods, I'm 35" depression. Hell, if you asked me 13 years ago if I even thought I'd make it to 35, chances are, I wouldn't be able to tell you (those were some rough days). But, I'm still here, still kicking. Hell, my mother is still alive and kicking... and this despite the heart attack that was the precursor to the triple bypass she had 10 years ago... AND the pace maker she just had put in a little over a week ago. Life doesn't suck so badly right now.

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You may notice down at the bottom of this page a couple of new things. One is a player for my "radio station" at last.fm. I'm still not certain how it works... and it has a habit of playing the same set of songs for some reason (I've heard Pantera's "Walk" about 5 times tonight... and it may have played more when I walked away to tend to a machine)... so I'll be looking into that. It's good stuff tho, this site... kinda part music tracker (especially if you download the scrobbler), part music community. Be assured that I'll be pushing my band's music there.
Speaking of that, you can check out some demo tracks (that was done 5+ years ago, well before I joined on) that are up at MySpace (and soon to be at last.fm as well). Be sure to check out PopRant there... and hey, I'm not above pimping: request to be our friends ;) Soon as we have a clear recording with me in it, I'll be certain to be posting that as well (because, well, I'm in it, dammit. Gimme my spotlight!)

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A'ight, back to work for me... will post more later.

4/20

I'm sitting here as Buddha is breaking down their set, realizing that on Sunday, should I make it to seventy, I will be at the mid-point of my life. Oddly, I'm not depressed by this. Rather, I reflect on all I've done in my life thus far... And how much more I still plan on doing. Life is not half over; it's just beginning.

Mmn...beer.

Is there anything you can't cure? i'm sure there's plenty you can't cure... But for that, there's duct tape. And fuzzy bunnies. I have a lot to write, but not now. Not from cell phone. Soon tho.

A Couple of Tid Bits

It's been a little bit since I've written last. I've been sick tho, and not quite in the mood for sitting down and writing out my thoughts (most of them have been of the "cough, cough, hack-hack" variety anyway... or else there's been Nyquil-induced slumber. And no, I don't know what kind of dreams I have on that stuff. Most times I don't remember what I dream when I'm -not- drugged-up, I certainly don't remember them when I am. Thankfully.)

I'm on the mend, though, which is a good thing. And, as par for course, it came just as spring change of weather was happening... and just in time for Easter. Which means that my holiday tradition stands, unchanged. Some things, they just never change, I suppose.

Anyway, on to non-sickness related stuff.

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I have a habit of keeping certain tidbits of information about myself very close to the vest. Those of you who know me to any degree are likely already aware, and probably annoyed with this fact. I have my reasons, some of which stem from a general distrust I have for people (it's nothing personal to anyone... I've been very guarded since I was a kid, for as long as I can remember)... and occasionally, from an irrational fear that if I let certain things out, something will happen to jinx them. That last bit is more in the case of things that are happening to me at that time, that I -want- to happen. Eh, I can be superstitious on occasion, I admit it.

Anyway, there are two reasons why I bring this up now. One, and it's the quick one, is that in conversation with my Mom yesterday, she had brought up that little "you never tell me anything" line that she does on occasion. Not really news there... but this time, she added "and you get that from your Father," which although wasn't news to me so much, did cause me to think a little more about it. Y'see, ever since he passed (gods, has it been ten years already?) Mom has been finding out little things that he used to do that he never told her. Nothing earth-shattering... silly little things, really. Like going out to breakfast by himself on Saturday mournings, after she'd leave to head out to the store (she used to own a candy store some years back)... or heading to the bar on occasion with a friend of theirs they used to bowl with. Things that Mom wouldn't have cared about... had she known about them.

Now I'm not going to try and get into my Dad's head, and start figuring out why he chose not to tell her... but I can say that usually my reasons for not telling her things is along the lines of my not thinking they're important. And to me, they aren't. Which means, that generally, I'm not looking to make a big deal out of anything. Which, again, if you know me... I'm not the sort who looks to make a big deal out of anything as a general rule.

The second reason that I bring this up, is a little bit of a long story. And short. The short version is this: for the past month or two, I've been learning bass and I'm in a band that's in the process of... well, there are a few different processes going on, really. In the process of auditioning musicians to round out the missing instruments; in the process of collecting the equipment necessary to put together a studio for recording; in the process of working out the kinks of what we already have, music-wise.

I've only told a few people about this until now. Big part of keeping this under the table has to go back to that whole "jinxing" thing I mentioned earlier. But another part has to do with the fact that I didn't want it to seem like I was following in other's footsteps, when that actually wasn't the case. I'm also aware that I'm likely the only one who's thought of it that way, but that comes from another issue I am well aware that I have: over-analysing any given situation. -smirk-

Anyway, as time went on, more and more people were starting to find out (from me)... until the day that something was said by someone else, in the presence of someone whom I didn't tell... and in truth, didn't want to tell (for reasons, I'm not even sure of. Yeah. Complicated, much?). Strangely, I've found that neither my world, nor the project has crumbled to pieces... and with the cat out of the bag, I might as well just toss it out for the world to know my intentions with this project.

I've taken a lesson (and saddly, just the one so far... damn our schedules) with my Bass Guru, Frankie (of Lewd Buddha fame)... and he got me on the right track with certain, basic things (like, you know, how to hold the damn thing correctly, among other things)... and I've been pretty much on my own since then. Tracy's been showing me the notes I have to play (between her and Matt, they have enough music written for 5-7 CDs or so... and most of them have been demo'd out by Tracy all by her lonesome)... and in my own, hobnailed version of TAB notation (which is a cross between tabs and actual notation), I've been writing it out so I can practice at home. I would personally say it's been slow-going (because when it's something I want to do, the speed of -thought- isn't even fast enough for me)... but I know I've surprised my two partners-in-crime in a happy way. Which means I must be doing better than I thought. Yay for me.
I've also layed out some money (which is saying a lot, since I haven't had a whole lot to spare lately) for a new bass. Looks sweet, sounds sweeter. It's one hell on an investment in what I hope will be a long future with this band. At some point, pictures will be taken, and they will be posted. Suffice to say in any case, making this purchase was my way of committing to this project I think we've got a future ahead of us.
So... we've been rehersing... and we're in the process, as I mentioned before, of finding more musicians to round out the group. I'm actually making it a point to -not- ask the folks I know, as most of them (if not all of them) are involved in groups of their own (and I don't want to become that kind of person who would make a friend make that kind of decision... that's just wrong)... not to mention the fact that the folks I know are actually all extremely talented, and at this point, those talents may well be wasted on us (no, I'm not knocking us, even though it sounds like I am. I just know that there's a huge curve, and there's still a lot for just -me- to learn. I wouldn't want someone to get bored waiting for me to get my shit together, ya know?). In the meantime, we go on the hunt, and we get our chops together. Things will come together one way or the other.
But we are on something of a self-imposed schedule. We'd like to be recording by winter... the sooner the music gets -out- there to be listened to, the better we'll feel (for Tracy and Matt, this is a project that started years ago, and stalled for several years, just reviving now). So that means that if we don't have musicians, then one of two things happen: one we do it ourselves, much like Tracy recorded those demos year back, or two... we get a couple of ringers for recording purposes (by hook or by crook) and keep looking. I may be asking favours. I hope I won't have to (again, conflict of interest. Still wouldn't be right). Meantime, it's only Spring yet... so there's time.

So that's it. That's my band-story in a nutshell. I'm sure I left out other parts... but that's the meat of the matter. It seems like such a little thing, this information that I've kept (mostly) to myself... but it's important to me. As important (if not a little more so) as my art is to me. I don't think people realise how big a role music plays in my life.

Anyway, I'm going to bed. I have to be up for work tonight... which means, that I should try to get in as much sleep as I can... maybe try to beat this cold into submission with a big ole' baseball bat of slumber ;)